The Bliss Project

In the last year, under the regime of "The Orange One" or, as I usually refer to him, the "Cheeto in Chief", it is my belief that most well meaning, and consciously aware Americans have been experiencing some sort of chaos or depression.  It's hard to know what's to come of our country when there is a monkey running amuck in the White House, right?  Well, after chatting with friends and seeing how this was actually creating a new sense of urgency in people to "live for today" and "make this life count", I decided that I wanted to collect stories, so speak.  To talk to folks about what they do to keep a smile on their face, or, ya know, stay hopeful, see the light. What feeds their soul??? 
The Bliss Project can be found on my Facebook page: Follow Your Bliss
Here's a link to the photo album:
https://www.facebook.com/pg/blissgoddess/photos/?tab=album&album_id=1044728208990671

 

Remember,

Be Kind

Be Honest

Be Brave

~ALWAYS~

 

When in the Big Easy

Anyone who knows me, knows my affinity for New Orleans.  The old, haunted feeling of it, the music, the food, the art... really, it's a place that has always called to me. 

It had been several years since my last visit, so, when my boyfriend and I started talking about going, I was ecstatic!

We first went last month for Mardis Gras, and that, in and of itself is a story!  We had so much fun, we decided to go back just a month later.  As it turned out, my fella's favorite band was playing at House of Blues, and he really wanted to see them live again.  So, after a crazy couple of weeks at work, and the emotional stress of watching my oldest son move to another state, we decided it would be great to make the trip again.
This was a short trip, arriving friday afternoon, leaving sunday morning, so, it was all about just enjoying it, no stress, no plans (except the concert).

 

I want to first give props to my flight attendant on our Delta flight from Atlanta to New Orleans.  We left Albuquerque at 6:00 AM, so I hadn't eaten.  The flight from ABQ to Atlanta was bumpy and we were in the back row...no windows. The folks in front of us and around us all had the shades down on their windows, so it was dark and the turbulence without being able to see out, was making me feel sick.  We had to run to our adjoining flight, so, there was no time to grab a bite at the airport.  When we got on the connecting flight, my boyfriend told the flight attendant that I hadn't eaten and was feeling really nauseous.  5 minutes later, she comes up to me with ginerale, Sunchips, a couple granola bars and bananas.  She was smiling and sweet.  I didn't get her name, I wish I would have.  She was great.
After landing and checking into our AirBnB on Frenchman, we ventured out for lunch.  Our host told us about a place called Horns.
https://www.facebook.com/Horns-860346813982274/

The menu was full of New Orleans style fare, and we were so hungry we had a hard time choosing.  I ended up deciding on the catfish with spinach and grits.  My boyfriend had a pulled pork po'boy, I believe.  The atmosphere there was casual and local.  Artsy and fun décor and what seemed to be original wooden floors and walls.  The bar was made of wood and seemed to have an oldness about it too.  The salt and pepper shakers were kitchie and adorable.  The staff was pleasant for the most part.  We had originally had one waitress who gave us menus and took our drink order, but then seemed to forget about us.  Another waitress saw me looking around and took pity on us.  She came by and took our order and was, from that point on, very attentive and sweet.  The food was good!  It was just what we needed!

We had the concert to go to later, so we took a little walk through the neighborhood and then headed to our room for a little nap.
Our AirBnB was on Frenchmen Street in the Marigny.  My favorite area of NOLA.  The house was about 100 years old, and the owner had put new appliances in and done other work to make it livable after having sat abandoned for over 20 years.  He lived upstairs and rented out the 3 bedrooms on the main floor. 

The concert that evening was at The House of Blues.
https://www.facebook.com/HOBNewOrleans/?hc_ref=SEARCH

Having been to New Orleans several times before, this is one place I just never visited.  So, we took the bus down to the area in the French Quarter where House of Blues is located.  Now, although I LOVE New Orleans, I'm not a big fan of Bourbon street or the crazy, tourist filled areas.  I go to NOLA for the music, the food, and the feeling in the air.  HoB is located on Decatur and although not as crazy as Bourbon, does tend to be close to where the tourists like to go.  While walking to the venue, I spotted gorgeous vintage dress outside of a shop.  DETOUR! 
SWOON!!!  I found a shop called Dollz and Dames.
https://www.facebook.com/dollzanddamesofficial/?hc_ref=SEARCH
The House of Blues seems like it would be nothing but a tourist trap, at least that's how I feel about places like this.  Famous, opened and owned by a famous person, several around the country....  I would not have even gone there, had the concert not been there, actually.  I admit now though, that I was pleasantly surprised.  The atmosphere, albeit, kitchy, was fun and full of smiling faces. We sat outside, and had a few Old Fashions, (our favorite drink) and while my boyfriend tok advantage of the crawfish boil, I had a veggie flatbread off the menu.  It was filling, the drinks were good and the service was friendly.  What my favorite part of dinner was though, was the band on the outside stage.  Whoooo Weeee... I don't know who they were, but those boys could play some blues!!!!  WOW!  Here they are, if you recognize them, let me know so I can tag them!  Thanks!
The reason for the trip was to see Matisyahu, who happens to be my boyfriend's FAVE band/performer/artist.... 
We went into the music hall and started to look for a place to set our drinks and hang.  We made our way upstairs and saw that the best seats were roped off, VIP.  Well, as he does, my fella found the maitre'd and got us into the VIP section.  This also got us access to the Foundation Room.  What a treat!  We walked in and the house band was super fun, and the atmosphere was "loungey" and sexy.  We of course had more drinks and talked and enjoyed the music.... oh, and a little secret that's not quite out of the bag yet.... we got engaged!
Ok...  That's another story entirely!
So...  Matisyahu was amazing!  We danced our butts off!  What a fun night!
We tried walking home, but, had been drinking, stopped for nachos and got turned around! lol!  We called an Uber... thank goodness for Uber late at night, right?
Saturday was our one full day in town this time.  We started our morning off at what we now consider our favorite breakfast place while in New Orleans. 
https://www.facebook.com/cakecafeandbakery/
We had eaten there while in town for Mardi Gras and staying at an AirBnB in the Marigny.  Our AirBnB this time was on Frenchman street, and not far at all from this wonderful little, neighborhood café.   

OMG, we had a Pan au Chocolate and a sweet roll and grabbed some sort of strawberry/custard filled slice of yumminess for later.  This was all before the main entrée of spinach and Portobello omelet.  We sat outside and enjoyed the beautiful spring morning. 
I do love walking through the Marigny.  The beautifully colored homes and the art in and around the neighborhood makes my heart happy.
The afternoon was somewhat rainy, and we spent the day just strolling through the French Quarter, walking in and out of some of the shops we love and a few we hadn't yet seen. I love Royal street for this, but there are sweet shops and galleries everywhere you look.
We ended up going into an antique gun and sword shop, where I had a pretty intense paranormal experience, which i'll save for another time.
During the rainiest part of the afternoon, we dipped into this little corner bar for a drink and some snacks. 
https://www.facebook.com/ChartresHouse/
We enjoyed a little Jameson on the rocks, along with their crab and corn bisque, and crawfish bread.  the atmosphere was a little posh, mixed with European tavern, meets French Quarter loveliness.  Our server, was very professional, and the food was lovely!
That evening, we had plans to hit a friend's art show in the warehouse district.  After a bit of time at our AirBnB, chillin' on the porch with a few of the other guests, we got ready and walked to the bus stop, to catch a bus to the street car and head from the Marigny to the Warehouse District.  By the way, getting around on public transit is pretty easy in the Crescent City.
Later in the day, we were on Frenchman street, and had a sweet tooth.  We popped in to The Praline Connection for a sweet treat.
https://www.facebook.com/PralineConnection/
We ordered sweet potato pie, coffee, Bailey's Irish cream, and something called a "shoe sole".  The best way to explain this is that it's like the best part of the sweet roll, smashed down, and made crispy on the outside by warming it.  My mouth is watering just thinking about it! 
So, we figured we would eat somewhere in that area.  My fella, being the foodie that he is, has been dying to take me to a fine dining establishment, and we just happened to be near Emeril's.  I wasn't too hip on the idea.  I didn't like the idea of being around uppity people and having to put on some sort persona that didn't agree with who I am.  Well, I finally agreed to at least see if we could get in.  I was dressed up, but for an art show, not a 5 star meal.  The host told us that we needed reservations, but, then looked up and saw an empty table in the bar.  They serve the full menu there, so, we went ahead and sat down. 
Waiter places napkin on lap.
Waiter has assistant.
Assistant never lets water get very low.
Appetizer: Greens = very tasty.
Meal: Salmon = bursting with flavors and melts in your mouth.
Dessert: Chocolate torte, along with espresso and a glass of lemoncello = WOW!!!
Ok, so, maybe fine dining like that is a sweet treat once in a while.
After that amazing meal, we made our way to our friend's art show.  Whew! Finally in my element!  The hippies and punkers and artists! Yay! The show was in a warehouse that had been converted to a bar and music venue, called The Howlin' Wolf.
https://www.facebook.com/pg/howlinwolfnola/about/?ref=page_internal
We looked around at all of the vendors, and came across my friend and her fella.  She makes art and jewelry out of toys.  I met her when I was in NOLA during Mardi Gras and we became fast friends, we knew we were kindred spirits.
We made our way back toward Frenchman street, for more art and music.  We tried to get into The Spotted Cat, but it was packed that night!  I love that place, and obviously, so does everyone else!
https://www.facebook.com/Spotted-Cat-Music-Club-192525186022/
There is a little open air art market right next to it though that I've enjoyed on our trips there.  As always, I picked up a few odds and ends from local artists.
After a lovely evening of food and art and music, we headed back to our AirBnB, where the host and other guests were all enjoying the lovely evening.  After a bit, we realized that we had had an early dinner and were hungry.  Our host told us about a little place called Fry and Pie a few blocks away.
https://www.facebook.com/fryandpie/
We made our way there for one last meal in New Orleans.  We got a little chocolate pie made with Guiness and the fries topped with cheese, and egg and bacon.  It was perfect for that 1:00 AM snack.  Fry and Pie is located behind the Hi Lo Lounge. What a perfect idea.  Late night fries and pies near a popular bar area!  Well, we sure enjoyed it!
So, all in all, food, drinks, music and art.... another great weekend in NOLA with my sweetie!
Can't wait to go back! 
(oh, remember the part about us getting engaged?  We are planning on getting married there during Mardis Gras next year!)
Here are just a few more pics I took from the trip.

Thank you for viewing! 

Don't forget to

Follow Your Bliss

~ALWAYS~



From Boy to Man: a few words of advice from mom.

Last night, my oldest child, my 18 year old son told me that he has decided to move out, and go live with his best friend in the next state over.  This didn't necessarily come as a surprise, because it had been in discussion, but, the fact that he has set a date, and made a plan, well, it just created the reality that my baby, my first born is ready to fly the coop.  

Yes, i know this happens...i didn't expect him to live with me forever, but...  i still can't help feeling sad and a little heart broken.  At the same time though, i am proud of him for taking initiative and making the plans necessary. He is only moving about 6 hours away, and he has a house and a job waiting for him.  He also said that this would be a stepping stone.  He would save up, come home for a bit, and then wants to move up to a state further away, but a place where my sister, his aunt lives, so will also have a place to stay, and hopefully a job at her pizza shop.  

As i wiped my teary eyes and cleared my throat, i told him that i am and always have been proud him and who he is.  I told him that all i've ever wanted for my kids was to make sure that they're happy and that i really, truly do want them to go out and create their own lives.  That i want them to have adventures and experiences, and that no matter what, he can always come home.  I also told him that i expect him to conduct himself with self respect and always be true to himself.  

After a long night of thinking about all of this, i came up with a few things i would like for my son to go away with. 
 So, son, as you begin a new chapter of your life, and enter into this new journey into manhood, here are a few words of advice from your mom:

*Conduct yourself with maturity and pride.

     You may have situations where someone may look at you and think that you don't know anything, or perhaps they are just being rude or think it's ok to belittle you.  You know who you are.  Always stand up for yourself, and always look people in the eyes when speaking to them.

*Help someone in need.

     You may be out on a hike and see someone with a flat tire on their mountain bike, or you see a little old lady struggling in a parking lot, step up, be the super hero of the story and HELP! 

*Be honest.

     I remember once when you were little, we were in line at our local Grower's Market and the man in front of us dropped a $20 bill.  You picked it up and looked at me, and i just looked at you and nodded.  You tapped on the gentleman's arm and let him know that he had dropped it.  He looked and you said, "why, no, young man, i think that belongs to you!"  You were elated.  Now that may not always happen, and you shouldn't do good deeds to get something in return, but, remember that in one way or another, one good turn deserves another, and that karma will always come back to you.

*Eat well.

     I know that most boys your age like to grab fast food, and stay up late eating Cheetos while playing video games.  I see you do it regularly.  I am asking that you take the time to actually eat fruits and veggies as often as possible.  Since i won't be there to make you teas and give you tinctures when your sick, like i normally do, please remember to keep yourself healthy with food.  Take your vitamins and keep some herbal teas handy for when your feeling under the weather.  (i'll tuck some in your travel bag)

*Be compassionate.  

    If there is anything that i hope you have learned from me as you were growing up, it is to show compassion for others. You may not have been born with a silver spoon, or over privileged, but no matter what our circumstances have been, both your father and I have always worked hard to find a way to make sure that your have the essentials; food, warmth, clothing... As you know, some people don't even have that.  In other words, there are many, many circumstance which could prompt someone to be acting a certain way.  Because of that, being aware and just being a nice human being is always appreciated.  You won't always know what someone else is experiencing, so, just act in a way that doesn't create more chaos, but rather, leave the situation better than it was. This may sound a lot like a few of the other rules on here already, but, they all work together really well when practiced, so, just practice them.

*Don't be a player.

     Ok, yes, we are going to talk about sex.  You are a young, handsome man who makes girls swoon.  believe me, i have been to enough grocery stores and restaurants with you to have seen this happen time and time again.  I also know that you know what it feels like to have your own heart played with.  There will be trysts and one night stands, of this i am sure.  Please, son.  Even when you know you are never going to see someone again, at least shoot her a text telling her that you enjoyed your evening and that she's beautiful.  Don't treat her like an object, and use your manners.  If you do meet someone who may strike your fancy and you want to get to know her, don't follow some dumb rule about waiting a few days.  Send her some flowers, or even a sweet text.  Let her know... but don't smother her.  Give her adequate space when she needs it.  

*Save money.

     This is, admittedly, something i myself have never been too good at.  For this reason, and the fact that you have seen me in times of struggle with no extra padding to fall back on, i hope that you are able to earn not only the money needed for you to get by, but for you to be able to put an adequate amount into savings every month. This way you have it in there.  You have that padding for when your car breaks down, or when your buddies say, "Hey, let's go to Cancun for spring break!"  Or for when you need some rest and need to get a plane ticket and come home for a bit.  I can not stress it enough.... SAVE MONEY!!!

*Be helpful
     This one differs from "Help someone in need" in that, this is about daily activities.  If you are at your own house, your friend's parent's house, your girlfriend's house, your mama's house (hint, hint), and you see dirty dishes, or a full trash can, take the initiative and do the chore.  It usually only takes a minute, and the person you just helped out will be ever so grateful that the load is off of their shoulders.  I promise.  You will shine like a shining star!

*Go to concerts and festivals!
     This may sound frivolous, but, you know what, son?  Live music and interacting with other people in the realm of your favorite performers can be such a sweet experience.   To dance and feel that music live is seriously one of the most amazing things in the world.  Then, to have those stories to take with you, to tell your friends, and one day, your own kids, that's priceless.

*Go into nature as often as possible.
     Wherever you may be, make sure to explore the woods, the lakes, the beaches.  In this world of go, go, go, and hustle and bustle...  taking time out to commune with nature is truly the best medicine there is.  Your whole life, you were raised around nature and appreciating the dirt and the rocks and the trees.  Never forgot your roots (no pun intended) and always remember the healing power of nature.

*DO YOUR ART!
     I can NOT stress this one enough!  You have had this amazing, natural talent since you were just a wee lad!  That day, when you were, what, 4 or 5 and brought me that replica of your Yu Go Oh guy and i thought you traced it, until i saw that it was on card stock...  i have been amazed with your drawings!  Please don't let that die with adulthood.  Whether it's for fun, for relaxation, or you are able to make a career out of it, never, EVER stop making art!

*Never stop learning.
     Wherever you are, whatever your doing in life, keep on learning!  Learn how to fix your car, learn how to build stuff, learn how to make a cake.  Pick up a book, take a class, or ask a friend who knows how to do something you want to do.  Just keep learning.  The more skills you have in your bag, the better off you are in life.

*Be true to yourself...ALWAYS
     You have a strong sense of self to begin with, which is wonderful.  Keep that!  Let it grow! You know that intuition you have always had?  Use it!  If you are feeling a pull toward something, or away from something, go with that.  Trust your gut, and stay true to your dreams.  Like i like to say, "Follow your bliss", and don't ever let anyone tell you that who you are, or what you do is wrong.  You are YOU, you are the only person in your head, and who gets to live your life.  I know i am bias here, but, son, you are ONE FUCKING INCREDIBLE HUMAN BEING!!!!

*Lastly.....  CHECK IN!
     While you are going to be out there in the great big world, living your life, and becoming an adult, your mama will be here, worrying.  It's what i do.  Remember... when i don't here from you while we are in the same town, i think you're dead in a ditch!  Imagine what's going to be going through my mind while you are in different towns and states???  Just, please, do your old mama a favor and check in once in a while!  A quick text to say you're ok will do my heart so much good!  Oh, and if i text or call...  please respond in a timely manner!  

I know this seems like a lot, and some of it may seem redundant, but, these words are my gift to you. They are things i hope you always remember in your life.  More than anything, you are my first baby to leave the nest....  my heart hurts at the very thought, but, at the same time, i am super excited for your journey and what comes next.  Remember that you always have a home to come back to.
I love you dearly!
Be Safe!
Be Brave!
And ALWAYS be YOU!!!!

Love,
Mom
     

When Life Hands You Lemons...

How much lemonade can one make?  Seriously?  How freakin' much?  

I am grateful everyday for my blessings, really i am, but...  the taste of sour lemons has created such a thick coat of muck in my mouth, i am ready to throw in the towel sometimes!

I'm not perfect, i make mistakes, but, don't we all?  I mean... don't we?  Is it just me, or does life sort of like to kick us when we're down?  This idea, this thought process i've always had that the energy i give, i will receive.  I'm kind, i always use my manners, i hold doors open for people, i smile at people, i even go up to random stangers to tell them that i like their hair or outfit, or to let them know that their tag is sticking up or they have something stuck to them.  You know,, one of those nice people in the world.  I work very hard at being emotionally responsible with my kids, always with words of encouragement, and several "i love yous" a day. Well, that idea tends to fade the older i get.  The more i find myself with more lemons!

I used to be a super happy human.  Always smiling, always positive.  As much as i could, anyway.  I was in a very unhappy marriage for far too long, and was miserable at home.  But, when i was out an about, i was sincerely happy.  I loved being around my friends.  I loved taking the kids for walks or to the park, but, i remember that being at home turned me into a different person.  So much so, that my kid's dad would accuse me of being fake while i was out with friends or a work.  He would say that people didn't really know the real me because i was always putting on an act with them.  I could never quite get him to understand that i wasn't acting at all.  The me that i was around my friends or at work was real.  I was happy.  The me i was at home was real too.  i was cranky and unhappy.  It was all very, very real! 

Don't get me wrong, we had our moments, our laughs, our fun, but, deep down, i knew that if i left a mess in the kitchen, or didn't sweep just right, i'd be yelled at.  There was the time that i went out with some girlfriends. We were going to see a friend of a friend at a singer/songwriter showcase.  Apparently  i told the husband that i'd be home around 9.  That's what he heard anyway.  In my memory, the singer we wanted to see wasn't due to go one until 9.  I had 2 small children at home, so going out with friends at this time was a rarity.  We were still fairly new in town and these girls were new friends.  After the performance, we walked back to the friend's house that we had all parked at.  The moon was full and she was at the top of a hill that faced the moon.  We stood outside and chatted for probably 3 or 4 hours.  You know, those nights when the conversation is just so good you can't stop?  I remember looking down the street a few times wondering if the family Volvo would come around the corner with the husband and kids looking for me.  He didn't know where this friend lived though.  So, finally, somewhere around 1 or 2, (we actually hadn't even realized it had gotten that late), we all headed home.  I had ridden down with one of the ladies.  She dropped me off and the house was dark.  i know i was "in trouble".  I sent her on her way, even though she knew i couldn't get in.  Yep, that's right, i had been locked out of my own house while the husband and the kids slept inside.  i knocked and knocked.  i even went to the side door that entered into out bedroom, right by the bed and knocked and knocked, calling his name to be let in.  I finally saw that the bathroom window was ajar, so i pulled a bin of dogfood over to stand on and hoisted myself up into it.  Luckily i was skinny, it was one of those smallish bathroom windows.  Of course he was laying there waiting for me, and we ended up in a big fight over where i was.  I apologized for being so late, (we didn't have a cel phone yet, this was around 2002)He told me that he'd left the bathroom window open for me, he figured i'd see it eventually.  I"m sure we made up, as usual, but not after the usual "go round".  The thing with us, just as a side note, was that there was no such thing as make up sex.  As the years went by and the fights didn't stop, my attitude toward him became more one of loathing, then love.  I loved him like family, but not as a wife should love her husband.  Yet...i stayed.  I became more and more miserable.  I know he found me harder and harder to be around.  

The point i am trying to make with that story is this, i am a happy person.  i have a passion for life, a lust for life so to speak.  I always have.  My kid's dad saw it back when we were young and dating, but, i know that it faded after a few years, so he saw me as a miserable bitch.  Which i was, but only at home.  

The point of all of this is not to bash someone who clearly has their own issues, but to try and figure out, but clearing my own mind, why, through my positivity, do i continue to have "life's lemons" handed to me., 

Lately, i feel as though life has been handing me more and more lemons, which is what this entire post is supposed to be about anyway.  I am currently a mom of 3 without a car.  The car that i've been driving for almost 2 years was stolen recently.  It was just swiped from out in front of my house.  Missing without a trace! As my teenage son would say, "SUCKISH"!!!

Everytmie i feel as though i'm beginning to see a light at the end of the tunnel, i get another slap from somewhere else.  I want to love my life again.  I do! I do! 

I am grateful for my kids, for my job, for my friends, for my art.... 

It would just be nice to stop feeling so much anxiety all the damn time though.  Like, "what next?" ya know?

So, i suppose, the moral of this story is to keep making that lemonade and maybe, occasionally spike it with vodka, huh?

Be Grateful

Be Brave

Be Kind

Be Yourself

and always Follow Your Bliss